it works, but this is modeled after the beginning of the price is right theme, where the first three notes begin on the last two beats of the first measure, assuming this is supposed to be in 4/4 time signature. the c would start with a sixteenth note on the end of the third beat, slurred to another sixteenth note on the beginning of the fourth beat. the low d would be an eighth note right afterwards, followed by another sixteenth note for the c. then the new measure would begin with the low g.
this would've been better if you made it just because you found what Carl Sagan said to be worthwhile, not because you're making some kind of counterpoint to one's argument, which you actually failed to do.
the thing about religious arguments is that they tend to refuse address and discuss possible contradictions to what one is trying to say. to avoid a mistake in logical reasoning like that is pretty much the status quo for college essays. hundreds of testimonies doesn't deny the possibility that all the billions of non-Christians who have died did so peacefully. if there is one case that can deny a premise, one is forced to reconsider the grounds for his argument. and i can testify for a few cases alone.
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